Personal Hygiene

This is because we all need to laugh sometimes....and I lack a filter in my thoughts.  Don't read if real shit bothers you. 


I encountered a small dilemma a bit ago.  Its become hard to masturbate due to the length of pubic hair.  I considered braiding it in pig tails to each side.  Something had to be done.  The pleasure is lost when your pulling on a hair attached to your ball sack.  It's quite painful.

After some thought I remembered seeing a comb in a buddies locker...I know, but he doesn't even have any hair.  At most he's doing the same thing with it.  So I ask to borrow the comb.  I then remove a blade and attach it to the bristles about half-way down.  Used carefully it will trim the hedges down to a comfortable length.  Taking my time and being extra careful, I completed the task of manscaping.

Then, the friend came by to chat.  He saw the comb in my locker and asked if I was done with it.  My plan had been to bleach it before returning, but I didn't find the bleach yet.  So I figure sure, you don't have any hair, what's the harm?  So I hand him the comb.  He takes the comb and begins to comb his beard!  Oh my!  Now I see why he has the comb.  It's all I can do to refrain from laughing out loud.  At this point what do I do?

After a few brushes through his beard, he then leaves the comb stuck on his cheek in a thick spot and continues to chat with me.  I'm watching the comb, affixed to his cheek, moving up and down while he talks.  All these thoughts in my head.  Almost 40 years old, and the shit I still manage to  get myself into.