Box of Rocks

I have this bad habit.  When taking off my shoes I use one foot on the heel of the other shoe to lazily remove it and save myself the trouble of actually bending over.  Now the heel of that shoe has begun to unglue itself and is attempting to fall off.  Now when I walk it makes this flapping noise and looks totally ghetto.  But...this is exactly what you get when you cut corners.  I need to quite this laziness and remove my shoes the proper way.

Here in prison Head N' Shoulders shampoo costs five bucks.  While you're in the shower some jackass walks by and swipes your bottle.  We call that the five-finger discount. 

So, I apply the shampoo before I head to the shower and leave the bottle in my locked storage.  This would be an example of a good corner to cut.

The other day my combination lock began to stick.  The dial would barely turn to open it.  I remember racing the boy scout derby cars.  The old man at the hobby shop told me to put powder graphite on the axels.  Makes the car fly down the track.

When my lock wouldn't open I remember the words of that old man.  Pencil lead.  Your pencil's lead is made of graphite.  So I used an emery board on the lead until I had a small pile of powder.  Then I put that powder on a piece of paper shaped like a funnel.  Then placed one end in the lock hole and blew the powder into the lock.  I then spun the dial a few times and shook the lock around.  Works better than the day I bought it.  Matter of fact, I'll bet if your door lock sticks you could do the same.  Just a thought.

I guess these aren't cutting corners as much as it's being smart.  Taking off my shoe with my other foot is probably one of my worst habits.  Now if I could only make a glue that would repair my freaking shoe....I'll work on that.

Summers here are hot.  The sun will scorch you during reck yard.  I began to mix my sunscreen into my lotion.  A 50/50 mix.  That way I always have some on me.  Sure, out there you can buy it that way.  Here they sell it separately, of course, so they can make more money off us.

Most prisoners become thrifty during their incarcaration.  Some decide to become smarter, better criminals.  Others came here dumb as a box of rocks and will leave the same.  Like the guy I just passed in the bathroom.

All tobacco products were banned from Florida prisons.  So now you pay $4-$5 per cigarette.  Guys take a regular smoke and break it apart and roll three "pinners" from the original cig.  Then they smoke it down until it burns their fingers.  Consequently, all the smokers have dark resin stains on their fingers.  The cops know this.  So now the smokers sand the resin off their fingers with emery boards or tile grout. As in the grout lines in the bathroom.  And that's what I just saw.  Dumb ass!

Dude standing there rubbing the resin stain off his finger.  That's not the worst.  Some dudes here pick up chewing tobacco that's already been used and spit on the ground.  They dry it out, then smoke it.  Rolled up in a napkin paper.  Shoot!!  I suppose if my worst habit is tearing up my sneakers, that's better than tearing up my lungs.  At least I'll live longer.  More pointless banter for ya!