Alright, Now, Everybody

1. This is Ester.  Hey, how are ya?

2. Where you been?

3. I live in a campground right now.  Isn't that kind of hilarious?  ...Only I'm not kidding.  I really just moved in to a campground last weekend, just for a couple months, but we are still trying to figure out the ancient wreck they're calling "wireless internet" over there, and in the meantime, I kind of look a lot negligent, don't I?

4. I really want you to stop around more, so the fact that I'm writing this from a McDonald's parking lot (only cause it's crowded inside - this is totally legal) should show I HAVE NOT FORGOT ABOUT YOU!

(No, I'm not shitting you ...and don't call me Shirley).

5. While I'm getting my act together, this is what I need from you:

• Patience
• Perseverance
• Diligence
• Non-frivolousness (just kidding, and I can't believe my spell-check didn't go ape-shit on that word... we DO want frivolousness from you, but mostly I wanted a rhyming list)
• FOLLOW THE BLOG!  (Technically, the link says "Join this site," but all they mean is that your cute little face is going to show up in a cute little box and we will feel very loved).

6. Yep, I know we ask a lot of you, but we also try and give you something for your troubles.  So here's what I'm going to give you if you just follow the blog (via Google Reader or Google Friend Connect) AND then are the name I draw at a later date:

Some home-made kind of crap that I labored over, which is nothing like Michael's skill in artwork, but will be either hilarious or badass, I haven't decided yet, ALSO: a rad tote-bag that advertises J.J. for us and also makes you look really edgy for reading a blog written from a prison cell (and is neither too femme or too masculine for anyone any sex, any gender to happily carry groceries or schoolbooks in it without shame), AND, finally, another thing which will be a badass Tattoo'd Hooligan shirt you have never seen before and will be the Best of All Time! It will also make you look totally bad-ass (not that you're not already!).

So here's the deal: I am not going to do this drawing until there are 200 followers, OK?  ...Right now we have 26 followers.  You can see ---> Over there?  ...In the right-hand column.  It says "Join This Site."  You just gotta sign up.  It's easy.  I am going to keep track of your asses, but I also need you to leave comments so that I know that you want the pile of wonderful crap that we have to offer, OK?  ...So, you know, some effort needed.  However, the thing we really need from you is patience.

SO!  Follow the blog, leave your comment letting us know your intentions, and hold your horses while I settle in for the long haul this winter.  We will be with you shortly!  

(Oh, did I tell you yet today how very good-looking you are?  I miss you.  I miss your face.)